Well, Then. *Puts on her Magical Merlin Meta Hat (tm)*

[solarcat]

I probably shouldn't write about this, because it can only bring teh wank to the door, but I have to. I read thingswithwings's post--specifically, this post right here this morning, and it has bothered me all day, which is something that rarely happens. I love my meta, but usually I can move beyond it, take the opinions offered with a grain of salt, and not let it bother me for very long. Twelve hours after my initial reading of the post in question, I still feel the need to write about it, so that's what you're getting here.

Reading the original post is probably a good idea (note: the author has essentially turned off commenting, so don't bother trying), but I will be quoting sections of it here. I will make every effort to leave those quotes in as much context as I can, and will try not to mis-characterize (what I see as) the author's intent. I am not a mind-reader, and I will likely manage to mangle something here, so I would like to apologize in advance. If thingswithwings should ever make her way here (look! I'm assuming gender already! XD ) and feels that I have mis-characterized her or her points, she is more than welcome to point that out to me in a comment, and I will of course be willing to clarify whatever I can of my own opinions and thoughts. I honestly do not want the wank storm, and I don't mean this post to be an attack on thingswithwings, who was (much as I am) just expressing her opinions. I just feel the overwhelming need to talk about this.

I will also note that I am neither an Arthurian scholar, nor any sort of academic at all. I have a BA in English and Religion and work as a lowly Editorial Assistant. I'm just your average fan (actually, considering the makeup of fandom, I'm probably a below average fan), so I don't claim to have any super-special knowledge or authority or anything. This is just my thoughts and opinions, and yeah, sometimes they might be wrong, or unpopular, or just plain weird. But I'd be glad to engage in a cordial discussion with anyone about any of my points, at any time. Talking is how we learn from each other, after all. =)

Also, possible spoilers for the entire first season of Merlin beneath the cut. Enter at your own risk. Plus, LONG POST IS LONG. (Sorry! I talk too much. ^^;;; )



I will preface by saying, thingswithwings did warn that if Merlin is your happy place, you probably should not read her post. But I am a meta whore, and telling me not to read something about one of my major fandoms is the equivalent of leaving the cookies to cool on the counter and telling a full Girl Scout Troop of eight-year-olds not to touch them until after dinner, then going for a walk and leaving them in the house with the unguarded cookies. *has no self-control* XD

So I read it. And yes, it bothered me quite a bit. But not, I think, for the reasons thingswithwings thought it would.

From my reading of the post, there is an underlying tone of you won't like what I'm saying because I'm going to show you all the problems with your fandom, which you have not noticed, and you will immediately feel bad about being fannish about your fandom, because of these problems. I have some major issues with the assumption that those of us who are fannish about problematic texts (for purposes of this meta, assume "text" to refer to the canon of a particular show/book/movie/etc) are only fannish about those texts because we haven't noticed the problems. I will return to this later, but it seems like a rather fundamental underlying assumption of thingswithwings's post, and I thought it was appropriate to begin the discussion there.

Yes, Merlin is a problematic text. I believe it is a very rare and precious text that isn't problematic in some way. These texts are created by people, and people, no matter how well-intentioned and aware of Issues, are flawed. We all have underlying assumptions and beliefs that we may be more or less aware of, and those color the things we create. But that's another discussion, and it will rapidly take us off topic, so let's jump back to Merlin. Here is what thingswithwings had to say (emphasis mine):

[I]t IS bad tv, and the particular way in which it is bad tv is not just historical inaccuracies and badly written dialogue and cheesy animated Clash of the Titans-reject monsters. It is bad tv in that it is misogynist tv, in that it is completely unthoughtful tv, in that I can pretty much guarantee you, after seeing thirteen episodes, that it is going to be painful to watch and it is going to CONTINUE to be painful to watch, especially on grounds of gender and race. It is never. going. to get. better. at those things. The show makers DO NOT CARE about those things. If you want some examples of this badness, let me rattle off a few in the misogyny category: women's magic is evil; women with power are evil temptress sorceresses who want to kill you; women who have actually pretty legitimate grudges are apparently insane and must be stopped (I kind of don't get why Nimueh isn't supposed to be sympathetic); if a good woman has magic, it's the uncontrolled, unconscious, dangerous kind that comes on her in her sleep and that doesn't actually help (because no one believes her); women exist in order for men to compete for them; need I go on. It's all the classics, guys. Marion Zimmer Bradley is probably spinning in her grave, god help her. Wasn't she supposed to have fixed all this stuff about women's cauldrony magic being evil? I AM JUST SO FUCKING SICK OF ALL THIS CASUALLY WRITTEN BAD TV THAT REINFORCES ALL THIS BULLSHIT. And, by the way, I have a whole nother rant about how aesthetically poor texts are often the same as misogynist/racist/heterosexist texts - about how those things often go together. I'll tell you about that someday.


This is her reading of the text, and therefore is entirely valid. Her opinion is hers, and I have no standing to contest it. But I do have issues with it, upon which I will now elaborate. At length. (Feel free to fall asleep, send covert text messages under the table, or do sudoku puzzles while pretending to take notes. I won't mind. ;) )

1. Women's Magic is Evil
This is a painful misunderstanding of the text, to me. I can't speak for anyone else, but I worry that perhaps many of us are so used to this being the case that Merlin isn't getting its fair shake. Let's look at the text for a minute:

Episode 1: Evil Sorceress (FEMALE) (1)
Episode 2: Evil Sorcerer (MALE) (1)
Episode 3: Evil Sorceress (Nimueh) (2)
Episode 4: Evil Sorceress (Nimueh) (3)
Episode 5: --
Episode 6: Evil Sorcerer (MALE) (2)
Episode 7: Evil Sorcerer & Evil Sorceress, working together (MALE & FEMALE) (3, 4)
Episode 8: --
Episode 9: Evil Sorceress (Nimueh) (5)
Episode 10: Evil Generic Bad Guy (MALE) (4)
Episode 11: --
Episode 12: Evil Generic Bad Guy, plus Morgana but not really (MALE) (5)
Episode 13: Evil Sorceress (Nimueh) (6) Believe me, we will be getting back to this one. Just roll with it for now.

And then let's look at the tally:

Evil Sorcerers (male): 3
Evil Men in General: 5

Evil Sorceresses (female): 6
Evil Sorceresses if you count Nimueh as one: 3
Evil Women in General, counting Morgana (with Nimueh as one): 4

I didn't count Uther here, because he's kind of always cast as a "bad guy" (with more or less justification for his actions at any given time, true), so he throws off the tally. This is a wholly unscientific measure, but...

How does this say that the text shows women's magic as any more evil than men's magic?

YES, you have Nimueh, who appears in four episodes as a major figure of "evil" (again, we will speak of this later), but it bears noting that she is also a major figure of "evil" in various versions of the legends on which the show is based. They did not pull this villain out of their hats. Uther could be viewed as a comparable "villain", but not really. YES, Uther is a source of tension and drama, but Merlin could wipe the floor with him if he wanted to. That he doesn't makes him the hero. That he could makes Uther unsuitable for a flashy, direct-conflict bad guy. Uther can't hurl fireballs at Merlin's chest, and if they're going to draw from the legends? Pretty much the only options they have are female. Nimueh is a logical choice, here, and given that, I feel that they've made a pretty good effort to also include evil, male, sorcerers in addition to the Evil Magic Womenz.


2. Women With Power Are Evil Temptress Sorceresses Who Want To Kill You
Really? I don't think we've been watching the same show. Referencing the above list again, let's take a look:

Episode 1: Evil Sorceress -- A grieving mother who wants to make Uther pay for executing her (magic-user) son by killing Uther's own son in return. Disguises herself as an, admittedly, fairly pretty woman (let's not revive the "Gwen is ugly!" Torchwood thing, please?) and acts vaguely flirty with Uther while attempting to execute her plan, but mostly so that she can slip in hints about how much she's going to kill Arthur and how Very Very Naughty Uther is. Doesn't count, in my book.

Episode 3: Nimueh. Attempts to kill everybody in Camelot as part of her revenge on Uther. Never actually interacts with any of the other characters.

Episode 4: Nimueh. Infiltrates the castle, is generally pretty and kinda distracting to Merlin, plays the "scared, vulnerable woman" card to get Merlin to do what she wants. Later plays same card to get Arthur to do what she wants. (Nimueh is sort of non-creative here.) **Evil Temptress Sorceress**

Episode 7: Evil Sorceress works with her father the Evil Sorcerer to put a spell on Arthur so that he falls in love with her, in order that they can lead him to the lake and sacrifice him to the faeries. **Evil Temptress Sorceress**

Episode 9: Nimueh. Sends Zombie Tristan to kill Uther (and/or Arthur; she doesn't seem particularly picky). Has angry discussion with Uther, in which it is revealed that Nimueh has actual Motives and is not just randomly evil.

Episode 12: Morgana, but not really. Morgana gets fed up, and decides to kill Uther. Yes, she's technically a magic user, but she doesn't have control over it (yes, this is another issue we will discuss). Doesn't count as an Evil Sorceress yet. (Is insanely UST-y with Uther, but that's not the focus of this essay. We're moving on.)

Episode 13: Nimueh, sort of. It's debatable precisely how much of the bad stuff "Nimueh does" here was actually Nimueh and how much was the general "old religion"/nature/Law of Equivalent Exchange (I'm looking at you, Fullmetal Alchemist! >.> ). If we assume that Nimueh had to direct the "trade" of lives in the episode, then she counts. If she was just the mouthpiece for something bigger/higher/more powerful, even if it is sort of esoteric and magical? Then she doesn't really count. Don't blame the priestess for what the god does, blah blah. (I told you we'd talk about this.)


To recap, in my reading of the show, we have TWO instances of "Evil Temptress Sorceress" in 13 episodes. (And seriously, I argue that Edwin totally counts as Evil Tempter Sorcerer, which is a whole 'nother issue.) Morgana, who is arguably one of the most "in power" Women With Power in the show, is not yet an Evil Temptress Sorceress (and we'll come back to that). That Nimueh only plays the "woe, I am a poor, helpless, ridiculously attractive woman; you must save me!" card once is fairly impressive to me, since it would be very easy to fall into the trap of letting that become her M.O., though it would only work on Merlin and Arthur the first time.


3. Women Who Have Actually Pretty Legitimate Grudges Are Apparently Insane and Must Be Stopped (I kind of don't get why Nimueh isn't supposed to be sympathetic)

Here we address the Problem of Nimueh. She is our main villain (after Uther, who I've already addressed), and thus is the antagonist. If we're on the protagonist's side, we are naturally going to be opposed to the antagonist. That's just how it works. But the idea that Nimueh is supposed to be unsympathetic? Where did that come from?

At first, we have Nimueh The Generic Villain. She appears, causes trouble, tries to kill someone, is defeated but not vanquished, and will return at some undetermined point in the future to wash and repeat. But as of Episode 9? That view of Nimueh is totally outdated and not consistent with the text. Nimueh is given a backstory and motives consistent with her previously-shown obsession with killing Uther and/or destroying everything he cares about. Uther is killing her people. He has killed many of her friends. Just as the grieving mother in Episode 1 is a sympathetic character, so is Nimueh as of this point in the show. We understand why she's doing what she's doing, and though we still want Merlin to "win", the cost and implications of that victory become less and less clear-cut and more and more morally ambiguous. We are given the implication that if Arthur becomes king too early (and, one might read into the text, for the wrong reasons, as in, if Uther is killed by magic) he may turn into yet another Uther rather than the Once and Future King that he's supposed to be. But we are also explicitly shown that Uther is a ruthless ruler with a huge swath of irrationality running through him where magic is concerned. He is, essentially, carrying out a genocide of magic-users. But (and this is the question Merlin struggles with in Episode 12), is it morally okay to kill him for it?

By the end of the season, Nimueh is far from a one-dimensional, "apparently insane" character, and we know it. Merlin and Arthur, however, do not. In fact, Uther pretty much gave explicit orders that Arthur should never know the circumstances of his birth, which are at the root of both Uther's obsession and Nimueh's. To Merlin? Nimueh is an insane, evil sorceress who must be stopped before she kills the people he cares about. (To be fair, it would have helped if she'd, y'know, just explained stuff instead of going on about how a life has to be traded for a life or hurling fireballs at Merlin or whatever.) But while Merlin's worldview is still fairly black-and-white (though it's definitely bleeding to gray after Ep. 12, where he actually has to wrangle with tricky morality), the audience has a more nuanced view of the situation. Reading Nimueh's storyline as saying "women who have actually pretty legitimate grudges are apparently insane and must be stopped" ignores that the audience and the protagonist have different knowledge, that Nimueh's death is far from an easy moral situation from the audience standpoint, and that the text indicated that those events will have far-reaching consequences.


4. If a Good Woman Has Magic, It's the Uncontrolled, Unconscious, Dangerous Kind That Comes On Her in Her Sleep and That Doesn't Actually Help (Because No One Believes Her)

And here we get to the Problem of Morgana. At the end of the season, she's going bugfuck crazy, and with good reason. Not because she's evil, not because she wants to. This is one of the places where the text of Merlin gets extremely interesting for me, because Morgana's storyline is all about that whole "women with power" thing, but in this case, it's "women with power will be undermined by men with power". (Or, more accurately, "people with power will be undermined by people with power", since Uther is doing it to Arthur, too, but that's another issue.)

Morgana has magic abilities; this we know from the text. In fact, she is a powerful seer, something that Gaius knows and doesn't tell her. This is the contrast between Merlin's situation and Morgana's, and part of why (I believe) Morgana will eventually become a "bad guy" and why Merlin won't. Merlin is the privileged one here. He is not only aware of his power, he's being trained to control it and use it. Morgana, on the other hand, isn't trusted with her own power. This isn't a problem with the text, this is a problem with the characters (particularly Gaius, whose ethics, imho, require another meta post all their own).

"For her own good", despite her incredible self-possession, bravery, and prowess with the same weapons that Arthur uses, Morgana is left unaware and unable to control her own magical abilities. Not even "left", but forcibly prevented by means of Gaius' "sleeping draughts", which she is told are to help her with her "nightmares". Having no means with which to train herself, or even fully understand her situation, it is no wonder to me that Morgana is slowly (or, toward the end of the season, not-so-slowly) descending into madness. Eventually, we the audience know, she will become another antagonist, another Evil Sorceress to be fought and vanquished.

The text here is not supporting the removal of agency from women with power. Rather, it's supporting the idea that taking away Morgana's power is a Bad, Bad Thing. By disenfranchising this woman, who could have been a powerful ally, out of a misguided desire to protect her (as if Morgana would be stupid enough to tell Uther that she has visions? Please. Gaius should know better than that), the men in the show who are complicit in this (Gaius, and to some extent Merlin) are creating their own worst enemy.

What's happening to Morgana can be read as feminist. The text is showing that discounting her and trying to take her power away are bad.


5. Women Exist for Men to Compete for Them

They do? Well, there's Morgana in Episode 2, who attempts to use her status as a "reward" to the victor of the tournament to tease and rile Arthur. But if you watch the episode, Arthur is far more motivated by his need to prove himself to his father and to the kingdom than he is by the "reward" of having Morgana on his arm at dinner. The "date" with Morgana is a device used to show something about Arthur and Morgana's relationship, and to add some humor to the end of the episode (wherein they argue about who saved who). Beyond this, which male characters are fighting over which female characters? I can't think of any other instances where this is even applicable, though I'd be glad to hear if anyone else has thoughts on this point. It's simply mystifying to me.


*Takes deep breath* Are you all sick of my blabbering yet? Well, I hope not, but I'll try to keep the next part a bit shorter. XD

I will skip ahead a bit in thingswithwings's post, because many others in the comments on that post have already discussed the problems that exist in the other texts she holds up as superior to Merlin for various reasons. Instead, I will reply to her characterization of... well, me. Or rather, us. All of us who are watching and loving and ficcing and vidding and talking about Merlin.

Here's the quote (again, emphasis mine):

[List of various other fandoms] None of these shows are perfect by a long shot, but at least they're all shows where you can say that the audience isn't being treated like a five year old child with an attention deficit disorder; at least they're shows where the authors care about the characters and the worlds the characters live in; at least they're shows written with respect for the audience. Merlin, like SGA, like Smallville, treats me like I'm stupid. Why should I have to put up with that?

5) Fandom migratory patterns are strange things. People don't go where the good shows are, or the bad shows are, or even where the hoyay is; people go where their friends are. People go where their favourite writers are. I'm no different: I go where my friends are, and where my favourite writers are - how the heck do you think I ended up writing lotrips? And, I mean, I started watching SGA because everyone on my flist was talking about people called John and Rodney. And look, that is fine, that is all good, I love the fannish hive mind and I love the way that the show matters less than the people. But in this case, maybe we could let the show matter just a little? Maybe we could not start building in Merlin-land too fast? Maybe we could just wait for another place for fandom to go, a place that maybe won't be quite so toxic? Maybe even a place that's for grownups, a place worthy of the incredibly intelligent people who are fans?

This... Okay, I'm trying very hard not to be insulted, but I am, and I think this is why I stewed and steamed over this all day today.

I am not a moron.

We are not morons.

Yes, there are times in Merlin when the text is playing slow-pitch, or even tee-ball, but you have to remember that it's being played on the BBC as a family show. Trying to demand the sort of depth and complexity one would expect from a show like (as mentioned) Buffy or BSG or the X-Files from a show that's being aimed at the 8-12 set, as well as the 35-40 set and all the sets in between (and some, I'm sure, beyond), is unfair to the show. But that's not what thingswithwings is implying. The only implication I can read into this is that we are all too thick to understand that we are being fed misogynistic, racist, and otherwise morally objectionable drivel.

We are being told, here, that our show is treating us like we're stupid, and if we sit around enjoying it anyway, well, then, we clearly are as stupid as they're treating us. And that, that, I cannot let pass without comment.

I don't want to try to sound pompous or self-congratulatory or anything, but look at what I just wrote. For the fan who's willing to dig into it, to look beyond the surface sheen and really explore the text (which, imho, is the heart of fannishness), Merlin can be a rich and interesting sandbox to play in. There's plenty of moral ambiguity to be dealt with, and the character's psyches are a near-endless playground (and since much of the show revolves around and relies on the characters rather than intricate plotting or stellar writing (c'mon, let's be honest), the characters are a logical place for any fan to start). But beyond the general depth of the show, my point is that there are all sorts of readings of a given text, and the fact that mine is not as outraged as yours? Does not make it a less intelligent reading. It just makes it a different reading, made from a different viewpoint, tackling the text in a different way. That I am not outraged does not mean I am a moron, nor does it mean I am not paying attention.

I am paying attention; I just got distracted by the shiny of the Gay. XD

And therein lies my second point about these comments.

Shiny show is shiny. Capslock-y, glittery, crazy fandom is capslock-y, glittery and crazy, and more fun than a barrel with a naked Merlin and Arthur in it. And you know? It doesn't need to be more than that. I am an admitted meta whore, and as you can probably tell by this point, I can talk about my fandoms forever. But sometimes (and for some people, all the time) you just want to sit down with the shiny and have a good time, without worrying about anti-feminist undertones, disenfranchisement, racism, and the whole host of other Issues we so often post meta about. Does that mean it doesn't exist? No. Obviously not. Does that mean that by enjoying your shiny, you're somehow guilty of tacitly approving of these things, or of being too stupid to see them? Likewise, NO.

TBH, I worry about anyone who can't "turn off" the "meta switch". How can you enjoy anything, if all you ever see is sexism, racism, anti-semitism, etc? It's a problem, I'd agree, if you are completely unable to see those things in the media around us. But if you always see it? If you can never ignore it? How can you stand to turn on the TV at all? If I spent my whole life in meta mode, I would break down in despair, and eventually end up the saddest little fangirl at the mental institution, screaming about the ethical responsibilities of TPTB to my imaginary roommate Billy.

In Conclusion?

Sometimes, I want to talk about the Issues with my text. Sometimes, I just want to have my capslock-y squee. Neither of these things is superior to the other. They both fulfill needs for me, though those needs are different. That Merlin fulfills both of these needs for me, as I need it to? That is why this show is magic. That is why so many of us are suddenly in love with it; not that we're all morons who don't know any better.




Ahh. I feel better now. ^_^

Public post is public, feel free to direct others to it and link to it at will. I'd actually like to hear what people have to say about my readings of the text, since I haven't laid them out like this before and I'd love to know what other people are thinking about these issues. =3 (But do try to keep it civil in the comments, yeah? I don't mind metafandom, but I have no desire to end up on Fandom Wank. ^^;; )

Comments

[rainchild.livejournal.com]

Ha, I'm glad you made this post because after clicking over to your link I was DYING to talk about it.

I am COMPLETELY WITH YOU on the meta-switch thing. The misogyny-ness of Merlin (and you made really good arguments against that anyways) really doesn't bother me. Maybe in our history there were misogynist tendencies that influenced storytellers/writers to make evil magicians female, but Merlin is a show based on old legends, and I DON'T REALLY CARE. Maybe that makes me a bad woman, but I get a lot more upset about, say, not giving women the right to vote, domestic abuse, etc. etc. than about there being statistically more evil female sorcerers than male. Frankly, I'd rather have the historical accuracy.

The idea that Marion Zimmer Bradley is turning over in her grave is sort of laughable, considering Morgana is more similar to Bradley's Morgaine than any other version of her I've seen. And there's the fact that Merlin has about the only female characters I've ever LIKED in a show/book/etc. (Hermione? Sam Carter? I think those are the only exceptions.)

(Sidenote: Being, like, the only non-SGA (or rather, non-SGA, non-Doctor Who) fan in the Merlin fandom is sort of weird. I have every respect for Stargate, seeing as I'm a die-hard SG1 fan who just never branched out to SGA, but still... WTF? How did the SGA thing even happen?)

Also, I'm sorry, maybe I have low standards, but I fail to see how Merlin is bad (CGI excepted). The characters have depth (I mean, how many other shows successfully flesh out and give voice to 6 main characters, complete with backstory, in 13 episodes?) and the relationships between characters are pretty consistent. I guess the plots can be repetitive, but I'm in Merlin for the characters, not the plot.

I will probably think of more to say later... *lots of hugs to you for giving me a place to rant*

[solar-cat.livejournal.com]

YOU FELT MY PAIN! XDDD

The female characters aren't the first thing I list when talking about why I love the show so much, but I definitely agree that it's wonderful to have likeable female characters in my fandom. I mean, I'm writing my fic, and I'm actually thinking to myself, "How do I get more Morgana in this bitch??", which NEVER happens. Usually I'm trying to avoid writing the female characters in the fandom, just because I don't really like them and I don't identify with them at all. (Which is probably a lot of why I'm a slash fan... XD )

(SGA. Oh, SGA. I can't even explain. There are piles of meta about sexism/racism in SGA, and it actually sort of gives me a headache to think about it. SGA I watch for the John & Rodney Show and the shiny spaceships and the Epic Space Battles and try to ignore most of the rest of it. =_=;; I love SGA, I do, but digging into the meta is a long, slow spiral into suddenly hating 90% of the show you used to love. :\ Which is part of the experience that led me to my "you are allowed to sit back and enjoy the shiny, damnit!" conclusion here, btw. )

The characters in Merlin are just awesome to me. I love them, I want to get to know them, I want to know more about them. ALL of them. That NEVER HAPPENS. <333

*hugs* My journal is always a safe place to rant! I am rant-friendly, so long as we don't all go name-calling and pulling each others' pigtails. XD

[rainchild.livejournal.com]

Isn't Morgana awesome? II think the only reason I've never been into femslash or het has been because the female characters have been so BORING in other fandoms. But I have now actually written slash, femslash AND het all for this ridiculously addictive fandom. <3

I'm still terrified they're going to mess Morgana up next season, though. I really, really don't want her to become crazy insane. :(

(Totally should have used this icon last comment, d'oh!)

[solar-cat.livejournal.com]

Hahaha, but the "swordy" icon is always appropriate! XDDD *luvs*

I do hope they don't ruin her character. I wouldn't even mind her going a bit nuts, but I want them to continue the sorta-kinda organic slide into it that they started this season, if they do.

God, I know! I've been mildly interested in femslash before (Devil Wears Prada represent! *fist bumps with nobody in particular*), but only in this show can I say that a femslash pairing one of my OTPs. Like, what?? *boggles* I love it! It's fantastic! \0/

[rainchild.livejournal.com]

Swordy! *heart*

They could do interesting things with crazy!Morgana, but it would mean letting go of her strong personality and witty comebacks. I'm not ready to say goodbye to that Morgana yet. :( 1x13 really bothered me there.

(Also, would totally have asked you to beta the femslash, but you seemed pretty busy with the beta-ing. Just so you don't feel left out. :P)

[solar-cat.livejournal.com]

Oh, god, I have to finish the beta-ing tomorrow. I'm so glad hils is nice and not threatening to shoot me for putting off the finishing stages of her fic these last two nights. =_=;;;

But hey, feel free to ask any time! I have the first two in my queue (for hils and carpenyx) done already, just on hardcopy since I do some of my editing at lunch (so I have to type up my notes and send their files back to them). So sometimes it looks like I'm a lot less done than I actually am. XD

[shinetheway.livejournal.com]

You aren't the only one! At least, not the only non-Doctor Who fan (I gave Torchwood a good faith try, but I ended up baking cookies while it was playing in the other room, and never finished the disc. Pity; I had hopes for that one). And while I liked SGA as a show okay, and read the fic if it was written by a favorite author, I never felt fannish about it, for reasons unknown.

Solidarity, sister!

[solar-cat.livejournal.com]

Okay, I gotta ask--did my journal/posts get linked somewhere?? XD (Sorry to ambush you, it's just that you're like, the third or fourth new commenter today, and that's a bit odd for my journal. ^^;;)

[shinetheway.livejournal.com]

Ack! no, no, nothing like that--I'm looking for a beta, and you were one of the last people to post on merlin_beta, and even though you said you weren't taking new authors I took a look at your LJ. [grins] And this post was just so damn well-written and on target, I stayed to read the whole thing. Sorry if I freaked you out.

[solar-cat.livejournal.com]

Oh, man. Does my post really come across like that? Eek! *goes to edit* I'm definitely taking on new authors, I just don't have time to be beta'ing epics or anything right now. I just wanted to let authors I'd worked with before know that if they DID have an epic, I would consider it, since I've worked with them before. ^^;;;

And don't worry about it, I'm not freaked or anything! It just seemed like a big coincidence that so many people were suddenly finding me, but I guess it must just be one of those days. ^^

[shinetheway.livejournal.com]

Heh--well, in that case...[looks hopeful]

Got time for a beta?

<-- shameless [grin]

Sadly, my epic days are not yet here. Although that's something I hope a beta could help me with. I've got an idea, and some written to start, but that little nagging thing called PLOT always seems to catch me out in the end.

[solar-cat.livejournal.com]

I might, I might. =3

Whaddaya got? And whaddaya need, which is the big question. Are you looking for just SPG check, or plot/characterization feedback, or all of the above? If it's an in-process thing, I can definitely give you feedback about what you've got, and I'd be glad to chat plot ideas with you. I know how helpful it can be to have someone to bounce ideas off! (I got rainchild_ai to do an in-process beta on my current epic WIP, and that helped me so much!)

[shinetheway.livejournal.com]

LOL. My old betas would tell you that I need someone to kick my ass over my lack of self-esteem, but that's neither here nor there. :-D I really need plot/characterization stuff, with some SPG if necessary.

I've got, uh. [counts] Three stories finished, but one has decided that it wants to be smut after all, so I think I'll give that one some more attention. Two more ideas waiting their turn to be written. A really long idea that has about a thousand words on paper so far, but needs a serious brainstorming session to figure out how I want to take it. And that's just the last week's worth. [sheepish] I can be kinda, uh. Prolific, when I get into a fandom liek woah.

[solar-cat.livejournal.com]

Hahahah, no, I totally know how the WIP folder can get! XD And the self-esteem thing. You should see the whinging on I've been doing in the last week or so about how much my fic sucks and I suck and it's all going to end in tears. XDDD *relies on her flist to prop her up*

I'd be glad to help you out, but I warn you that I'm a bit slow during the week. I work pretty long hours, and I do like to have some time to deal with RL stuff and my own writing! XD But I get plenty done on the weekends, and occasionally on my lunch break if I'm stuck on my own fic.

How long are the finished pieces? If you want to send 'em my way, I'd be glad to take a look and see what I can do for ya. But I warn that you might not get them back until the weekend, just due to my own time restrictions. ^^;; As far as brainstorming, I can definitely hang out on an LJ post or AIM if we schedule it at some point and let you bounce ideas all you like. So that's definitely workable, if we can make it work? XD

[shinetheway.livejournal.com]

They aren't long, 2K words or so each. I'll email them, shall I? [hugs] And taking your time is fine. Hopefully they don't require TOO much work. [grins] I appreciate it! [hugs]

[solar-cat.livejournal.com]

Oh, that should be fine, then. ^^ I'll do my best to get them back to you quickly! And yes, email is the best way to get them to me. I believe it's on my profile & the beta post, but if I'm wrong, solarcat05 (at) yahoo (dot) com is the way to reach me. =)

[rainchild.livejournal.com]

Yay, solildarity!

Lately I've been thinking about giving Torchwood a try, since everyone else in the Merlin fandom loves it. Sometimes BF forces me to watch Dr. Who. I don't know how he would feel if I started asking, "Hey, can we watch the one with the gay kissing instead? It seems better... Because of the plot, that's it."

[solar-cat.livejournal.com]

TRY IT. TRY IT. ONE OF US. ONE OF US. @__________@

XD But seriously. Try it. There is lots of John Barrowman making out with hot men. ...And occasionally there is some sci-fi plot. But mainly it's John Barrowman making out with hot men. Sometimes, he even does it live. (http://superherofan.livejournal.com/342545.html) <3

Have I gotten you to try it yet?? XD

[rainchild.livejournal.com]

Okay, I will...

Oh man, there must be some serious RPS in that fandom.

[solar-cat.livejournal.com]

...after that, I guess there must be. XD *hasn't actually gone looking for it, if you can believe*